Don't really have an end of year post, nor a post about the plans for the
future. I don't have the cope to go through all the things of the last
year, and I don't want to put plans down on virtual paper for the future,
if 2017 taught me anything, is no plan survives contact with the Cosmic
As for this New Years Eve, my original plans for movie, dinner, and a
party/show in Fort Worth. But given that Ithaqua had a flying visit in,
and the roads are being closed due to the lousy weather, the plans were
changed to hiding at home. Given how I deal with social anxiety, this is
probably for the best. Plus I rather ring in the new year with horror
movies, snacks and reading.
So here's to the end of 2017, and to the beginning of 2018. May Cthulhu
rise from his depths, may Yog-Sothoth open the gates, and may Scarlett
Johansson finally get a Black Widow movie. Iä! Iä! and all that jazz!
And all through the Château Innsmouth, the shoggoths were stirring, mostly
because Vulpine is having a day. No, I'm not turning this into a prose
poem. Just feel like talking about the holidays.
They used to be a big thing for me, as a kid/teen. So many memories of
putting up the tree with Mom and Dad, laughing at silly stuff and stories,
just good stuff. As a teen ager, I started renting REALLY bad movies for Xmas eve as the folks went to bed, starting with 'Rabid Grannies'. It wasn't a
Norman Rockwell holiday, but it fit us just fine.
Then Dad died, and the first Christmas after that really
kind of made me wish to never here another jingle bell again. The family
tradition boiled down to taking Mom out for Xmas eve, or her cooking something.
Telling stories, and giving each other presents. Very little 'holiday' in it.
Then I met Amythest, a true Christmas Pixie. When we were together, I
tried to de-scrooge at least on the outside. Things got easier after we split
up, but became friends again. We had our own traditions, including both of
us going to visit my Mom, which Mom always liked.
I tried turning the holiday on it's head a little, created my version of
Cthulhumas. Cthulhumas Ctharols from the HPLHS, weird cards, reading
'The Festival', finding horror movies either about the holidays, or more
enjoyable for me, movies that have weird relations to the holidays. 'Haunting
of Hell House' or 'The Amityville Horror', 0 festiveness, 100% happening
around the holidays. I'd help Amythest and Nymaz put up a tree, and do
outside decorations (something I swore as a kid I'd never do). New
traditions, friends, and that sad core in me got smaller...
Then Mom died. And since then the Cthulhumas game isn't as fun, in fact
I haven't listened to Cthulhumas Carols this year at all. I've narrowed
down my 'holiday' to a few hours with Amythest and Nymaz when they get
back in town. And honestly, I'm just hoping I don't have a complete crash
tonight. Plans for tomorrow is full on hermiting, probably in a book or 3.
Then it's back to work when I have a moderately sized pile of stuff to knock
out. So...wish me luck on surviving tonight and tomorrow. And maybe finding
a smidge of that old Cthulhumas spirit.
Another long week. Jury duty last Monday. Would have been a hell of a case,
in a bad way. Luckily for my sanity, the defendant agreed to a plea bargain
and we all go to home. The rest of the week has been work foo, I'm really
learning to loathe Sybase. Still do like my job, mostly because of the
people I work with. Had the company holiday party on Thursday, was fun
until my social anxiety went to 11. Yesterday (Friday) was pretty lousy
as well. Stressors from work, friend issues, a whole bunch of wishing this
year was done. That's kind of a theme lately.
Today, I woke up and decided that I needed a self spoiling day. Went and
got gas, and went on a tour of Half Price Bookstores in the area. Kind of
over did it, but I got some really cool books for the library. Mythos
stuff, some esoterica and a book about the
Beast of Gévaudan;
, which was the inspiration for the movie 'Brotherhood
of the Wolf'. Also a few movies. While driving around I went by King Tut's
again for comfort lamb. Also drove up for critter care while some friends are
on vacation. One kitty hid from me, the other saw the sucker sign and came
up for pets. Came home, finished up season two of 'The Exorcist' and watched
a couple of flicks. Then, as I was starting to ponder book time...work
screams. Fecking databases. Hoping we cleared it up right now...that seems
to be a no. *sigh* Ok, going to wrap up this post because I'm out of
Went to see 'The Shape of Water' today with Nymaz. Been looking forward to
seeing this since it was announced. It was an amazing film. Like his
'Crimson Peak', which was a mystery that happened to have ghosts in it,
this was a love story that happened to have a fish person in it. The
only monsters in it were people. The two most emotive characters don't
speak verbally, there's sign language, but as much of the dialog was in
body posture, head tilts, stuff like that. There's even a couple of musical
numbers, one of which was probably my favorite scene in the movie. The bad
guy isn't a cartoon villain, there's a logic to his actions and he's
obviously a product of his career. Everything meshes and it plays out
near perfect. Well, bad things happen to a cat, which I could have passed on.
But it is understandable in context. And yes, there is fishperson sex. And
weird straight people sex, and lonely person sex. Might not be to your
tastes, but I don't think it's that big a deal. Also, keep your eyes
out for little easter eggs and references. Oh yeah, I wouldn't call it
Lovecraftian, definitely weird though. Long story short, if you like del
Toro, and want a movie with a very positive message about like and love and
being 'human', go see it. 5 out of 5 flared gill slits.
This has been the weekend of electronics being a pain in the ass. Come
home Thursday night, and my media PC is acting wonky. Can't reach the
media drive via NFS. Verified the drive is readable, and NFS is running
on Dagon. So I assume something got stuck, NFS is annoying that way, and
reboot. Come up with a failed OS drive. Well, damn. Ok, I'd planned to
swap it out with Shoggoth, my local network server that doesn't do much.
Ok, so I spend my Friday off getting things moved around and hooked up.
To find out sound doesn't work. Googling got me either 'use a USB sound card'
or 'Sound works fine'. So I go and order a USB sound card that supports
Linux with 1 day delivery. Which gets delayed Saturday, so...no media
PC. I've watched a bunch of movies on my multi-region bluray player (which
I had a frustrating time getting to change region til I remembered the
remote control pattern).
I also planned to listen to audiobooks. My normal way to listen is on
The Shining Trapezohedron (my phone), using a bluetooth speaker. So of
course, what starts having issues ? Yep, the speaker is in flake mode.
I verified it wasn't the phone using my bluetooth headset. *grumbles*
Again, I have a work around (Audible's website), but it's bloody annoying.
I like the bluetooth speaker, because I can wander around the apartment with
it while doing chores. Feh.
Also, besides Amazon shipping fail, the post office has delayed two other
packages due in Saturday. *sigh* But at least they managed to deliver a
book of books from a Kickstarter I funded. Yay new book smell.
Otherwise, it's been a pretty lousy weekend. Not dreaming well, stressed
and anxious. The holiday foo is getting to me pretty darn hard. Just
have to get through the next 4 weeks. Hoping to have a better 2018. I
can dream, after all.